Author: The Fresnan

Hey, Mikey Seay here. Local nerd. Longtime blogger and podcaster. I love talking local, Star Wars, beer and other junk. Find me on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat: @thefresnan CHEERS!

Where Does Fresno Need A Pedestrian/Bike Bridge?

The Fresnan

img_2050 Where Does Fresno Need A Pedestrian/Bike Bridge?

This week I saw Bike Portland talking about a bike bridge that is up for city approval (that’s so Portland). It got me to thinking…

Where could Fresno use a bike/pedestrian bridge?

  • Blackstone & Nees. You saw the AMAZING rendition at the top of the post (big thanks to the Fresnan Art Department), so I don’t have to explain the location on this one. Easily crossing over from Barnes & Noble to REI sounds cool, yeah?
  • Cedar & Barstow. Thinking somewhere on Cedar, between Barstow and Bulldog Lane. Ya got all the Fresno State students living West of Cedar, then you got everyone going to the football and baseball games. Seems like a no-brainer.
  • Mama Mia’s & My House. It would make it so much easier to pick up my gnocchi if there was a bridge from my driveway that went directly to Mama’s.
  • Blackstone & Shields. People are jaywalking here all the time. This fixes it. Probably. Plus there is a new Chipotle or something, you need to get to.
  • Fulton & Inyo. I hear there is going to be so much fucking traffic going down this new look Fulton Street that you, nor your Fulton Mall business, is going to be able to handle it. Money will be falling out of the sky, people will be parking like crazy and having the time of their damn lives. Fresno Grizzlies’ “Parker” will finally get laid. The few people that will be brave enough to walk amongst the major thoroughfare of newly imagined Fulton Street, will need a bridge over the insane traffic that Fulton Street Mall will definitely totally have. And Clovis Girl will be able to walk in safety.
  • Friant & Fresno Street. You have the new shopping center on the East side of Friant and Downtown North on the West Side. Feels logical.

We are a big enough city, guys. Making it safer to bike and walk around is a major factor in making us a cool city. I’m having some fun here, but really, let’s bridge.

Where else would you like to see a bridge in Fresno?

Catching Up On Fresno

The Fresnan 3 Comments

high-speed-rail-1024x576 Catching Up On Fresno

Sorry, loyal Fresnan reader! I missed my self-imposed Tuesday night deadline for a new post. I was deep in the Oregon woods with no Internet. It was relaxing and annoying all at once.

So, come with me as I try to find some Fresno that I missed.

Tacos!
The now nationally famous, Taco Truck Throwdown, happened. It can be considered the tent-pole event that proves we are the Taco Capital of the United States. Joey Chestnut ate many, others dropped a lot of salsa on the ground.

High-Speed Rail!
Will Fresno become a bedroom community for the Silicon Valley? We shall see starting in 2025. I foresee a mix of our own organic tech community (see: Bitwise) and San Jose commuters. Personally, I will just use it to see shows at Shoreline. (pic above a rendering of Fresno’s station)

Booze In All The Wrong Places!
With the City Council wasting time being overly concerned about legal pot dispensaries, they conveniently forget about the real problem in Fresno. That problem is too many liquor stores South of Shaw.

The last thing a rough neighborhood needs is a liquor store. Please work on this problem, City Of Fresno, and don’t waste time with scaring people into thinking a few pot dispensaries would EVEN COME REMOTELY CLOSE to being as bad as an ugly liquor store on every corner.

River Park Became The Red Waste!
A fire plane “malfunctioned” and dumped fire retardant all over NE Fresno, including River Park. This bit of news somehow made it past my lack of Internet while on vacation because funny always makes it through.

Alright, I guess this isn’t funny if your business or car got messed up, so I am truly sorry for those folk. But when I heard that a fire plane dumped red junk on River Park, I did laugh.

Gary Bredefeld Embarrassing Fresno Again!
Northeast Fresno truly has the Councilman it deserves. Determined to do and say as many dumb things that he can within a year, Breders believes all City workers with a weapons permit should bring their gun to work with them. WHAT A FUN WORK ENVIRONMENT!

So now the sketchy dude we were already worried about coming into work wanting to shoot the place up one day can constantly walk around the office ready to mow me down at the first sign of stress and it’s perfectly legal!

This idea made national news, if you somehow think Breitbart is actually news. Sadly? for Gary B, Fresno already allows select vetted workers to carry their penis enlargements guns, which is a little uncomfortable to just now learn. Research much, Gary?

That Is Enough For Now.
If I missed something you think I’d find interesting, feel free to leave it in the comments. Thanks for being here!

The Season Of The Mosquito: Fresno Summer 2017

The Fresnan

img_1711 The Season Of The Mosquito: Fresno Summer 2017

Whaaaat the faauck with the mosquitos This year? Worst. Ever. We even had to release a crapton more mosquitos in attempt to calm down the bad mosquitoes and made national news for it.

This has been used liberally all Summer.
img_1708 The Season Of The Mosquito: Fresno Summer 2017

Have you ever noticed that you get bit more than your friends do or maybe you are the lucky one that rarely gets stung?

I get bit more than most and a post by I Fucking Love Science has explained why this is, including this chart:

img_1709 The Season Of The Mosquito: Fresno Summer 2017

Did you see the beer drinker
factoid? DID you!? That freaking sucks.

My favorite Fresno thing is relaxing on a patio or by a pool, in the evening, with a beer. I am a prime candidate for mosquito attacks.

At least it SEEMS like the mosquitoes have been calmer this week. Maybe they are on their way out for the year.

Which is good because I don't want to resort to living like this:
img_1710 The Season Of The Mosquito: Fresno Summer 2017

*Mosquito pic from here.

When Is The Damn Fulton Street Opening Anyway?

The Fresnan 6 Comments

img_1596 When Is The Damn Fulton Street Opening Anyway?
ME: I have grown weary of the continuous string of Fulton Street Mall updates within my social media feed.

VOICE IN MY HEAD: What the hell are you doing posting about Fulton Mall Street then!?

ME: I dunno, bro, I gotta post about something! People expect, you know, something.

VOICE IN HEAD: Jesus, you suck at blogging and this is already boring.

ME: Agreed.

But you see, a big thing happened on Fulton today. To make room for cars they moved the Clock Tower across the “street”. I guess the time had come…

I know this because it was all over local social today.

It was on Facebook:

john-rupe When Is The Damn Fulton Street Opening Anyway?

On Twitter:

On Instagram:


On Google Plus: Just kidding, nobody posts on there anymore.

There is even video:


So now that’s out of the way, the City Of Fresno feels confident enough to announce a Grand Opening date for cruising Fulton Street. That date is October 21st!

You may be like me and have questions about this Fulton Street and its October (yeah, we’ll see) opening. Let’s go through a few:

  • Will there be asphalt? Yes.
  • Will there be room for two cars? Yes.
  • Will there be room for Clovis dually trucks? No.
  • Will the fountains work? Supposedly.
  • Will Parker get in some sort of zany wreck on Fulton Street? One can hope.
  • Will there be parking meters? Yes.
  • Will I have to learn how to parallel park? Yes. It seems that parallel will be the parking style of choice, down Fulton.
  • Will I be able to get drunk on the sidewalk? Hopefully. And if Fieldwork opens up a taproom on Fulton? For sure.
  • Will that old buffass dude with the boombox still be blasting on Fulton? Yes – he will find a way.

So I’ll see ya out there in October, I guess, fighting for a parking spot. Actually, I probably won’t even try and end up parking in front of Tioga like I always do.

*top pic stolen from City of Fresno’s Twitter feed.

I May Have Ruined Fresno’s Chance At A Fieldwork Taproom

The Fresnan 5 Comments

img_1530 I May Have Ruined Fresno's Chance At A Fieldwork Taproom
I’ve been trolling Fieldwork Brewing’s Twitter account.
Occasionally when they announce a new beer being released at one of their taprooms, I re-tweet and add something like “And soon our Fresno Taproom”.

You see, California allows breweries to open up a certain amount of “remote” or satellite taprooms. Remote being a taproom not on the grounds of the brewery or in their home city. Fieldwork has one in Berkley (main brewery) and four remote taprooms: Napa, San Mateo, Sacramento and soon to be Monterey. State law allows five remote taprooms.

Fieldwork has only one left to give. I want it to be Fresno.

Berkeley’s Fieldwork Brewing is arguably the hottest brewery in the state. They make damn fine beer. It would be a real kickass thing to have them open up their taproom here. We are on the look out for coolass things for Fresno after all.

Hell, maybe a rooftop Fieldwork taproom in Downtown Fresno? Sounds pretty freaking sweet to me and you can add it to the Ale Trail, bro.

But don’t get excited, Fresnan. I may have been trying too hard and messed it all up – the story of my life. 

At first, a recent Twitter troll looked promising.

SUCCESS! They want to take a tour! I’m The Fresnan and on a craft beer podcast, I can show them some cool junk! Let’s do this!

But then they started researching shit.

“Wait until the fall”? That is basically “Don’t call us, we’ll call you.” DAMMIT!

But as long as there is still a chance for the one remaining taproom to come to Fresno, I’ll keep trying. I don’t care how many beers I have to drink while waiting. I will not do it for me, I will do it for Fresno!

*pic stolen from thebrewermagazine.com

 

How Are We Going To Make Fresno “Cool”, Yo?

The Fresnan 19 Comments

Phoenix-rootop-bar How Are We Going To Make Fresno "Cool", Yo?

We have a problem here. A problem I bounce around in a post from time to time but never take on directly.

What will it take for Fresno to be considered a cool city?

If you’re thinking “Hey, but wait, I already think it’s cool!” I don’t disagree with you, but we both have to acknowledge that we are in the minority, chief.

How do we make Fresno appear cool to an outsider? This is what I’m talking about. To a Fresno State grad, we lost to brain drain? What can we do to win that person back? It’s a question that Fresno creatives have been wrestling with for many years.

First. The Immovable Object.

We are land locked, no getting around that. Except that we are not as landlocked as Denver, or Boise, or Dallas, or Every City Not On The Ocean. We can go to the beach for a morning surf session and be back in town for a late lunch.

So while this is tough, we have workarounds, it could be a lot worse.

The air sucks. It does. But, the past couple years, it feeeeels like it has gotten better?  And if California can (continue?) to lead in clean air…stuff and things? Maybe I’m being naive but I feel like future technology and regulations will make the terrible air a thing of the past. But we definitely need to be a lead-city on clean air initiatives.

Booze May Be An Answer.

Here might be a cool city suggestion we can work on:

Rooftop whiskey bars, eh? I definitely like the idea of rooftop things – like the pic at the top of the post from a Phoenix rooftop bar. And adding a niche element like whiskey is the kind of thing that pushes something from being “Oh that, you can find that in every city.” To “Oh that is rad, I wish we had one of those in our city.”

That unique, “can’t put my finger on it why it’s cool but I just know it’s cool” thing is really what we need to get at here in Fresno.

Touting our agriculture backbone. Being sunny almost every damn day. Embracing our sports, like the soccer community that gets bigger every year:

We’re just spitballing here.

The Cool Roots Are Taking Hold.

We have things already going for us. Not many cities can boast that they are a “basecamp city” to three National Parks. One of which, Yosemite, is considered by many to hold the most beautiful place in the world, Yosemite Valley – and I am in complete agreement with that.

There are other signs of coolness brewing as well. Bitwise pushing Fresno into the tech and startup scene is a big one. The rising craft beer and coffee scene. Branding ourselves as the Capitol of Tacos. These are the kind of things to ride into the cool town sunset.

So let’s tally up some of the cool stuff we got and the stuff we can do more of:

  • Agriculture.
  • Craft Beer – even more breweries.
  • Bitwise and tech.
  • Tacos.
  • Sports – including soccer.
  • Diversity.
  • Leader In Clean Air.
  • Outdoor city – more trails, parks, and owning the Sierra Nevada closeness.

This is but a humble start of a list by a blogger that only went as far as Fresno City College – a great community college, btw. I know only bits and pieces of things. So I choose you to comment and help.

What are some of your suggestions? Leave a comment! On the August episode of Flowing With Famous, myself and Joshua Tehee will parse them out and talk about them on the podcast.

Cool? Cool.