You Lie About Not Going Downtown Because Of Having To Pay To Park.

When talking to North Fresno person, a common statement made is, ”I won’t go down there because you have to pay to park!” I call bullshit. You just don’t want to go.

Don’t want to meet that friend. Don’t want to go to that Grizzlies game. Don’t want to have a beer at HOP PK or Tioga. Admit it. Admit it so we can all go on with our Fresno lives.

You really would go to Downtown Fresno if all the parking was free? Interesting. So if Target or Walmart had parking meters or you had to pay to park in their lot, you wouldn’t go there? Bullshit.

If Pismo’s made you pay for parking you would not go there? Bullshit.

If you had to pay to park at Edwards you would stop going to the movies? Bullshit.

If Save Mart made you… Okay, you get the idea. Bullshit. We are all bullshit. Parking is bullshit. Downtown meter complaints are bullshit. Bull. Shit.

It is just what you do when you live in a city. Can you name a city bigger than Fresno that doesn’t have areas of their downtown pay-to-park? I’ll wait.

And hey, parking in Downtown Clovis is free and it sucks ass trying to find a good space. I usually have to park well away from the dumb Clovis business I am being forced to go to.

Suck it up and feed the meter and shutup about it. #endrant

If you would like to change your North Fresnan Afraid Of Downtown Parking ways, might I suggest having a look at Joshua Tehee’s Downtown Fresno Parking Primer?

When Is The Damn Fulton Street Opening Anyway?


ME: I have grown weary of the continuous string of Fulton Street Mall updates within my social media feed.

VOICE IN MY HEAD: What the hell are you doing posting about Fulton Mall Street then!?

ME: I dunno, bro, I gotta post about something! People expect, you know, something.

VOICE IN HEAD: Jesus, you suck at blogging and this is already boring.

ME: Agreed.

But you see, a big thing happened on Fulton today. To make room for cars they moved the Clock Tower across the “street”. I guess the time had come…

I know this because it was all over local social today.

It was on Facebook:

On Twitter:

On Instagram:


On Google Plus: Just kidding, nobody posts on there anymore.

There is even video:


So now that’s out of the way, the City Of Fresno feels confident enough to announce a Grand Opening date for cruising Fulton Street. That date is October 21st!

You may be like me and have questions about this Fulton Street and its October (yeah, we’ll see) opening. Let’s go through a few:

  • Will there be asphalt? Yes.
  • Will there be room for two cars? Yes.
  • Will there be room for Clovis dually trucks? No.
  • Will the fountains work? Supposedly.
  • Will Parker get in some sort of zany wreck on Fulton Street? One can hope.
  • Will there be parking meters? Yes.
  • Will I have to learn how to parallel park? Yes. It seems that parallel will be the parking style of choice, down Fulton.
  • Will I be able to get drunk on the sidewalk? Hopefully. And if Fieldwork opens up a taproom on Fulton? For sure.
  • Will that old buffass dude with the boombox still be blasting on Fulton? Yes – he will find a way.

So I’ll see ya out there in October, I guess, fighting for a parking spot. Actually, I probably won’t even try and end up parking in front of Tioga like I always do.

*top pic stolen from City of Fresno’s Twitter feed.