Breaking: Fresno Man Almost Remembers To Bring Bags With Him Into Save Mart

img_1122-1 Breaking: Fresno Man Almost Remembers To Bring Bags With Him Into Save Mart
I have yet to remember to bring shopping bags in with me when I go grocery shopping. Not once.
Oh I have them in my truck. And I go to a grocery store at least once a week. So I have had MANY chances to remember since the plastic bag ban – a ban I am in favor of, for what it’s worth.

Usual stores I shop at (for no particular reason):

  • Save Mart on Herndon & Milburn.
  • Save Mart on Bullard & West.
  • Save Mart on Ashlan & West.
  • Whole Foods.
  • The Market.

Anyway, the other day I actually remembered while I was turning to park. “Bring in your bags” my brain said. So here it is. I have finally remembered. It took three months but I have done it.

Nope.

The 20 or so seconds between remembering and shutting off my vehicle was enough time for me to forget AGAIN.

One day. One day I will remember. Until then I get to act like a rich badass and buy all the paper bags!

Save Mart Checker: “How many bags should I charge you for sir?”
Me: “Four! No, wait, FIVE! That’s right, I’m just too damn important to bring in my own bags.”

Related: How I feel when I forget my bags in Whole Foods:

Top Fresno Street Names

img_0933 Top Fresno Street Names
Yep. This is a real post. The best Fresno street names according to me. Oh, and you will not find “Palmdon” on this list because there is no way that can be a legal name.

So. Take a cool name and add a little city importance, you get this:

  • Van Ness Extension. Like hell if we’re going to think up a new name. Let’s just slap “extension” on it, even though it’s over a mile away.
  • West. Because it actually goes North & South.
  • Ivy League School Series. Yale. Harvard and the other ones and stuff.
  • Bullard. When you drive through Fresno State’s fields you can go all fast and there is the slight danger of a tractor crossing your path.
  • Palm. Premier bike lanes in the city – suck it, Brandau.
  • Shaw. It sounds like something Wayne or Garth says, in place of “AS if!” “ShaWW right.”

via GIPHY

  • Fulton. Part of the lazy “just use San Fransico street names” series.
  • Blackstone. It has all the things; even HOOKERS! Wait. Blackstone still has hookers, right?
  • Fresno. Duh.
  • Friant. It’s also a dam. It’s dangerous. It totally flooded by Woodward Park the other day.
  • Weldon. Fun to say. Wel Don. Weldon. Weldadadon.
  • Fruit. Because fruit is what makes the cash around these parts and I have a totally “legally purchased” Fruit sign on my work bench.

img_0939-1024x768 Top Fresno Street Names

Not making the list is Ashlan, Tuolumne and McKinley, because they are hard to spell.

This Is Not A Local Music Blog

img_0688 This Is Not A Local Music Blog

I miss Audie’s Olympic. Barely seen a band in Fresno since the place begrudgingly closed. I blame Audie’s closing on my lack of seeing local bands play lately, but that is a copout. Still, I miss it.

Yes. Strummer’s is there and still scheduling bands. So is Fulton 55. Frank’s Place does a thing or two, I think. Cool, cool.

There are new local venue things too. Tioga Sequoia Beer Garden has a lot of music. Goldstein’s has music. These are places that were not much of a factor musically when Audie’s was still operating.

And none of these places match up to the true rock club vibe of Audie’s. Nor can they regularly bring to town the kind of shows that Audie’s brought in. Not the touring, fresh, rock bands or mid-level local kind of shows anyway.

What the Fresno Grizzlies are to a professional baseball player, trying to get into the major league’s, Audie’s was to rising touring or local bands.

And, you could just hang out in Audie’s – as long as the style of music was not too grading to you, that is. Just hang and have a beer, sit on a stool, occasionally stop and look to the stage to enjoy a nice set. Didn’t even need to be there with anybody.

NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH A LOCAL MUSIC BLOG

I hesitate to write this post because it personally concerns me. I don’t want to do what I did before and turn the Fresnan into a music blog that is not supposed to be a music blog.

That is what it was when I previously put this blog on ice. Just posts about local shows. Which is fine if you brand yourself a music blog. The Fresnan was not branded as a music blog. I got lazy and complacent.

If you want a local music blog, check out Spanspek or read Joshua Tehee stuff. Do it.

SPEAKING OF LOCAL MUSIC

So Josh Tehee and I just posted a new Flowing With Famous podcast and in it we picked out favorite Fresno music acts of 2016. My pick was The Light Thieves:

Josh picked two. Beastmaker

…and Sagey. Now Sagey was a new one to me. Josh talked about how these guys have the local buzz right now and I think I get why:

I will keep listening to what Josh has to say about the Fresno music scene because he will find out first when (or maybe if) Audie’s opens again as a new music club.

I might finally be motivated to get back into the local music scene. Maybe see a Sagey show. Sit on a stool.

*I am finally starting up a newsletter. It will augment what you see on The Fresnan with a bent toward local life in general. Sign up below!:

Fresno Stuff To Know At The Thanksgiving Table

Fulton-Mall-Street-by-Ronnie-Samuelian Fresno Stuff To Know At The Thanksgiving Table
Fulton Mall Street by Ronnie Samuelian

WOW, Beth! This is one year you want to stay WAY THE HELL AWAY from talking politics at Thanksgiving. If the table acts like my Facebook feed, things are going to get real uncomfortable, real quick.

Screw all that mess. Talk about Fresno junk this year. It’s universal and sorta kinda doesn’t matter what party you are mostly down with – I am down with whatever party David Lee Roth is at, in case you were wondering.

Here are some Fresno things to bring up at the turkey table that your Uncle may not have been paying attention to. Or maybe for your friend Jason that is back for the Holiday weekend because he moved away because he blamed Fresno for all his stupid little problems but really you know he is just a whiny lazy conceded dick and would not be happy in any town he lived in but WHATEVER now he moved and thinks his life is SOOOO great but we know that it probably isn’t at least that is what we tell ourselves to feel cool when he tells you how great Los Angeles is and how his job really kicks ass and the girls are amazing and it was the best decision of his life.

Damn you, Jason.

THE FULTON MALL IS NOT A THING

You saw the picture at the top of this post, right? The Fulton Mall is gone, GONE I say! And we are inching closer to Fulton Street with parallel parking – Lord help us.

Speaking of Downtown, a new park is set to open in the Culture Arts District/Muraltown/LoftCity/Uptown, complete with cool lighting:

Culture-Arts-Park-from-Daniel-Draper-1024x683 Fresno Stuff To Know At The Thanksgiving Table
Photo by Daniel Draper
SPORTS

Hey, look! Former Fresno State QB Derek Carr and his smoky version of the Blue Steel look, is on the cover of ESPN the Magazine – that’s something safe to talk about:

derek-carr-854x1024 Fresno Stuff To Know At The Thanksgiving Table

Also, Jeff Tedford is the new head coach of the football team and that’s kinda rad. All the while Pat Hill’s FU-Manchu does radio for ESPN 940. And the basketball team might probably be good again – sadly they are not in town this weekend.

POLITICS

Read More

Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

steaknshake-1024x538 Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

Steak n’ Shake Fresno has closed!

UPDATE: Was it the location? Was it the prices? The menu? Your lazy ass not caring about a chain you knew nothing about?

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Check out this for more info but you can no longer go to Steak n’ Shake in Fresno. It has closed due to lack of business.

I really don’t think the problem was putting it in the Sunnyside Area of Fresno. It was that particular spot that was the problem. Very odd, like you were in a hidden industrial park.

There are rumors that a North East Fresno location is in the works but I think it is just a rumor.

Oh well. Below is my original post about Steak n’ Shake coming to Fresno.

Since you can’t get a Steak n’ Shake burger in Fresno anymore, check this out so you can at least season one like it.

Original Post:

A little late on this post but… I need to talk about this Steak ‘n Shake that is being built in Fresno on Kings Canyon. Yep, Kings Canyon.

This is a new-to-Fresno burger chain that is out of Normal, Illinois. It has some cult following to it, sorta similar to In & Out and White Castle. It looks like a Johnny Rockets meets Five Guys to me.

I have never eaten or heard about the place before, but I see they got something called the Cheddar Cheesy that I will be all about trying:

SNS_DSteakburger_Cheddar_Cheesy_060616_350x300 Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

The most interesting thing about this place coming to Fresno is not the food. It’s the location. A chain with some buzz around it is being built in Sunnyside area and not on or North of Shaw. About fucking time.

Of course the Internet has issue with the location

Not everyone on Facebook is down with it being at Kings Canyone & Peach. An example:

beth Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

Well, Beth. That deserves some replies. Don’t you think?

Wow-Beth Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

I love the last comment from Rosie, “Wow Beth!”  … Wow Beth. I really like saying that, “WOW, Beth!” I think I will be using that in my everyday life from now on. Whenever somebody does something that’s surprising or controversial or something unexpected happens, I will be saying “Wow, Beth” as a response. I hope you will join me.

Oh but Beth was not alone. There were others. Like, John:

Steak-n-Shake-Facebook Only Fresno Can Make A Steak n Shake Opening Controversial

There is a lot more than those but you get the idea.

The Sunnyside Area Deserves Nice Things

Hey, a burger joint in a Walmart Center might not be considered a “nice thing” but it’s still cool.

The Sunnyside area deserves this. They were supposed to get a new “River Park Style” shopping area and that has never happened.

But if you still feel like your Northeast Flowvis area is “underserved”, you can always look into franchising a Steak n’ Shake on Willow & Nees for yourself.

Fresno Has The Best Artist Renderings

IMG_8118 Fresno Has The Best Artist Renderings
You know those artist renderings? Like the one above for the Fresno Aquarium – by the way, the aquarium is a thing that will finally happen for Fresno… one day.

Fresno has had some cool renderings over the years. They get you all excited about the potential. My current favorite is this one:

FultonProject Fresno Has The Best Artist Renderings

A planned mixed-use project that would be on Fulton, across the street from the Tioga Sequoia Beer Garden – I already need to be hanging out on one of those balconies, drinking a Tioga beer, looking back at Tioga from the balcony, yelling to people in the Tioga Beer Garden “Hey, Tioga! Look at me! On this balcony! With my Tioga! Tioga!”

There is also the remodel of Manchester Center, with some updates on the project. They have been working on getting it started since 2013, as this video demonstrates:

Not all of the renderings come to pass

During Mayor Bubba’s time, I can remember a pretty sweet rendering of the Downtown Lake and Riverwalk proposed. But, alas, I can not find it on the local internets. I think that was the same timeline of Bass Pro sniffing around too.

I also remember a render for Running Horse development and country club. Yeah, that only sorta happened. Some guy named Donald Trump came around trying to get the City of Fresno to give him all the things. They wisely did not. I wonder whatever happened to that Trump guy…

We talked a little bit about Fresno renderings on Flowing With Famous this month. Here is a clip of that:

If you have a historically awesome Fresno rendering your memory deems worth mentioning, leave it in the comments.