Only Super Rad Skate Tricks Are Allowed On Fulton Street Mall Now

The Fulton Mall is gone. I know. It’s tough to hear. But it’s true. It’s gone.

I already miss the debating.”What are we going to do with the Fulton Mall!?” “Maybe if a Starbucks opens that will save it!” “A Starbucks? Fuck you. All local businesses, asshole!” “They just need to get the fountains working!” “No. They need to have more signage for parking and educate North Fresno about…”

All that is over.

Traffic has returned to Fulton Mall Street… wait, I can’t even include “mall” anymore. Traffic has returned to Fulton Street, for the first time and whateverhowmany years. Even though the Grand Opening is not until next month, you can already drive down parts of Fulton Street. Rev up them Clovis dually trucks and have at it.

Speaking of having at it, skaters are already having a go at the functioning again fountains on Fulton Street.

https://twitter.com/MarekTheBee/status/911687432793288704

Nice move, bro. So, fun, right? WRONG! The skateboards are fucking up the new cement! At least that’s what I’m told.

There was a big battle on a local Facebook group this past weekend. The battle involved a person not real pleased with the skateboarders and BMX bikers already using Fulton as a skate park. And the skaters/bikers getting a bit saucy in their response to the “Get off my damn lawn, you lousy kids!” attacks.

Should Skaters Be Allowed On Fulton Street?

This is actually a damn good debate, both sides have a good point.

PROS FOR SKATERS ON FULTON!

  • Skater tricks are fun to watch.
  • Sometimes they fall and it’s funny.
  • I feel young a cool watching skaters do skaters things and imagine what it’s like to be awesome and stuff and think “Yeah, I could totally do that if I wanted and stuff, but I don’t so whatever.”

CONS FOR SKATERS ON FULTON

  • They damage (over time and inadvertently) the new cement with their boards, and could hurt their butts trying to perform a trick. Nobody likes to have a hurt butt.
  • They seem pretty cool and I’m afraid I’ll feel old and lame as I walk by them.

So what to do, what to do… well, the City of Fresno is apparently working on how to deal with the skateboarders:

https://twitter.com/MarkStandriff/status/912380453595660289

This sounds like skaters will be on their way out.

But enforcement would be tough. Fulton Street is not River Park. River Park has security roaming around all the time. Fulton does not. The skaters are free to do whatever. That is until a random Fresno Police Person comes by or a concerned Facebook Group Citizen…person suggests that maybe they could possibly stop.

I say let the skaters stay for now. There was a time when skaters were the only people using the mall after the sun went down. I remember walking down the mall at night, 10 years ago, and recording video of skaters doing tricks on the Fulton Mall because it was literally the only cool thing I had seen on the mall at night.

But if they suck at skating? You know, like, they only perform boring tricks and fall down and break off cement and look totally not cool?… done.

*Pic stolen from a ABC 30 Insider.

Where To Park At Whole Foods Fresno – The Most Important Blog Post You’ll Read In The Next Five Minutes

Since Amazon bought Whole Foods, people are a little worried about Amazon taking over all the things. I would be worried too except Wal Mart already did it, so let’s stop freaking out. Maybe focus on stopping Wal Mart and not worry so much about Whole Foods until they are dealt with.

Anywayyyy, the Fresno Whole Foods, located in Fig Garden Village, may not have a top ranking parking lot, but it is an interesting one.

I know what you’re thinking “Holy shit, this asshole is going to do another parking related post. What the hell is this site and why am I still here!?”

LOOK, BRO! People like this stuff. It’s like, everyday life and crap. It’s fun.

PARKING LOT BREAK DOWN

I’ll get to my favorite parking spot in a second. But first, the worst place to park? The Main Lot. You could also call this the Western Lot:

Oh sure, it looks benign now. But it’s tight and super annoying. You know how many Prius you have to avoid in this area? Look, I can see one in that picture already. I never park in this area.

As an extension to this lot, there is the area next to Habit Burger’s patio. I do sometimes park here, but only when going to Habit and not when I am just shopping at Whole Foods.

BETTER SPOTS

I’m not sure I would walk THIS far (even though I am a big advocate of walking instead of driving around searching for the closest spot), but if you’re feeling adventurous and really don’t want to park next to anyone, get out to the North side as it gets closer to the Wassabbi’s parking. No drama out here (except for a dude that can’t park straight):

This one has chargers. And hey, there is even a car getting charged up as we speak. Way to save some air, dude:

While not all of us can park in those particular stalls, I do like that lot to park in. The area closer to the apartments is a good one because it’s not busy.

But it’s not my favorite area to park. In fact, my favorite is not even an area. It’s one parking stall in particular. It even has its own restroom… Continue reading “Where To Park At Whole Foods Fresno – The Most Important Blog Post You’ll Read In The Next Five Minutes”

7 Fresno Things I’m Totally Not Doing Right Now But Should Be!

I have really good Fresno intentions. You know, do all the cool Fresno things all the time. In actuality that does not happen very often. Like everyone, I’m busy. But when I’m not busy, I’m lazy and I like to hermit.

Sometimes I need to push myself to Fresno more and these are seven random things that are nagging me at the moment:

  • Planting more food. I have a peach tree, a grapefruit tree I rarely use, a fig tree, a pepper bush, but I need more. If there is space in the yard it needs to be filled with plants that grow food. Fresno is the damn food capital for a reason, muthafuckaaa.
  • Returning to Forestiere Underground Gardens. It’s kinda been a long time. Long time (*whispers* Star Wars reference). Every time I drive by and see people there I feel bad and say “I gotta go!” (pic at top).
  • Turning off my damn phone and maybe enjoying a night on the patio with my thoughts or talking to another human. That is what Fresno nights are all about. This talking to humans thing can be rather difficult though.
  • Taking cold showers. Nooooo, not for the reason you’re thinking. Because this is maybe the best way you to start a hot day in Fresno. I really think that when I end my showers with a minute of cold water, it helps my core temp stay lower during the day. Might be bullshit but I really do believe it.
  • Going to Taco Bell less. Fresno is the taco capital. Yet, I will still get them damn crunchy corporate tacos more times than real deal. They are just too damn easy to get.
  • Hiking more. We need to be an outdoor city and I need to do more of this hiking junk. The San Joaquin River Gorge looks like a good place to start.
  • Attending more local music shows. Ever since Audie’s Olympic closed, I have a hard time dragging my ass to a show. Although I did see Farooq at Tioga Sequoia recently and that was rad.

You have a list of Fresno things you need to do more of or even start doing for the first time. Leave it in the comments and I’ll see you on the trails. Just don’t forget the cold shower before you go.