Herndon: Fast & The Sometimes Furious

I used to think I was pushing the limits of speeding on Fresno’s streets when I’d go 60 mph down Herndon during my morning commute to work.

No longer. It seems 70 is the new 60 and I’m being left behind. “Out the way, sweet cheeks!”

Oh and don’t slip up getting onto Herndon thinking 50 is going to work. I see people pull out on to Herndon and immediately regret it. “Shit I done fucked up!” is the face made often.

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But Herndon in NW Fresno is different from NE Fresno Herndon. The “Clovis side” of Herndon, as I like to call it, has a hard time even reaching the speed limit:

So I guess I’m pleased to have the “freedom” of getting up to 70, if I so desire. It seems we deal with less congestion in the NW.

And, I’m not asking for Fresno PD to start setting up shop at Sierra Sky Park (I’m no narc, bro!), just making an observation.

Something to ponder, Fresnan reader: Is there any other surface Street in Fresno you can get up to 70?…

Where Does Fresno Need A Pedestrian/Bike Bridge?

This week I saw Bike Portland talking about a bike bridge that is up for city approval (that’s so Portland). It got me to thinking…

Where could Fresno use a bike/pedestrian bridge?

  • Blackstone & Nees. You saw the AMAZING rendition at the top of the post (big thanks to the Fresnan Art Department), so I don’t have to explain the location on this one. Easily crossing over from Barnes & Noble to REI sounds cool, yeah?
  • Cedar & Barstow. Thinking somewhere on Cedar, between Barstow and Bulldog Lane. Ya got all the Fresno State students living West of Cedar, then you got everyone going to the football and baseball games. Seems like a no-brainer.
  • Mama Mia’s & My House. It would make it so much easier to pick up my gnocchi if there was a bridge from my driveway that went directly to Mama’s.
  • Blackstone & Shields. People are jaywalking here all the time. This fixes it. Probably. Plus there is a new Chipotle or something, you need to get to.
  • Fulton & Inyo. I hear there is going to be so much fucking traffic going down this new look Fulton Street that you, nor your Fulton Mall business, is going to be able to handle it. Money will be falling out of the sky, people will be parking like crazy and having the time of their damn lives. Fresno Grizzlies’ “Parker” will finally get laid. The few people that will be brave enough to walk amongst the major thoroughfare of newly imagined Fulton Street, will need a bridge over the insane traffic that Fulton Street Mall will definitely totally have. And Clovis Girl will be able to walk in safety.
  • Friant & Fresno Street. You have the new shopping center on the East side of Friant and Downtown North on the West Side. Feels logical.

We are a big enough city, guys. Making it safer to bike and walk around is a major factor in making us a cool city. I’m having some fun here, but really, let’s bridge.

Where else would you like to see a bridge in Fresno?

Catching Up On Fresno

Sorry, loyal Fresnan reader! I missed my self-imposed Tuesday night deadline for a new post. I was deep in the Oregon woods with no Internet. It was relaxing and annoying all at once.

So, come with me as I try to find some Fresno that I missed.

Tacos!
The now nationally famous, Taco Truck Throwdown, happened. It can be considered the tent-pole event that proves we are the Taco Capital of the United States. Joey Chestnut ate many, others dropped a lot of salsa on the ground.

High-Speed Rail!
Will Fresno become a bedroom community for the Silicon Valley? We shall see starting in 2025. I foresee a mix of our own organic tech community (see: Bitwise) and San Jose commuters. Personally, I will just use it to see shows at Shoreline. (pic above a rendering of Fresno’s station)

Booze In All The Wrong Places!
With the City Council wasting time being overly concerned about legal pot dispensaries, they conveniently forget about the real problem in Fresno. That problem is too many liquor stores South of Shaw.

The last thing a rough neighborhood needs is a liquor store. Please work on this problem, City Of Fresno, and don’t waste time with scaring people into thinking a few pot dispensaries would EVEN COME REMOTELY CLOSE to being as bad as an ugly liquor store on every corner.

River Park Became The Red Waste!
A fire plane “malfunctioned” and dumped fire retardant all over NE Fresno, including River Park. This bit of news somehow made it past my lack of Internet while on vacation because funny always makes it through.

Alright, I guess this isn’t funny if your business or car got messed up, so I am truly sorry for those folk. But when I heard that a fire plane dumped red junk on River Park, I did laugh.

Gary Bredefeld Embarrassing Fresno Again!
Northeast Fresno truly has the Councilman it deserves. Determined to do and say as many dumb things that he can within a year, Breders believes all City workers with a weapons permit should bring their gun to work with them. WHAT A FUN WORK ENVIRONMENT!

So now the sketchy dude we were already worried about coming into work wanting to shoot the place up one day can constantly walk around the office ready to mow me down at the first sign of stress and it’s perfectly legal!

This idea made national news, if you somehow think Breitbart is actually news. Sadly? for Gary B, Fresno already allows select vetted workers to carry their penis enlargements guns, which is a little uncomfortable to just now learn. Research much, Gary?

That Is Enough For Now.
If I missed something you think I’d find interesting, feel free to leave it in the comments. Thanks for being here!